Tuesday, July 14, 2015

In My Shoes

I wear the shoes of a mother who has lost a child.

Give me all of the advice you want but you have never been in my shoes.

My shoes are too small and are suffocating on a daily basis.

Yet at times, they are too big and I struggle to keep my footing.

Sometimes my laces are too short and frayed and I can't tie them so I am unstable on my feet.

Sometime the laces are too long and even if I tie them, I have to avoid tripping on their ends.

There are holes worn in my shoes leaving me open to the very outside elements I am supposed to be protected from.

Inside my shoes are bunyaned tarsals weary from the journey.

When I try to stiffen the discomfort with socks, it only suffocates my feet even more.

The materials in my shoes are flimsy and porous, protecting me from none of the world's hazards.

Sometimes they feel so new, the painful blisters are a reminder.

Everyone else thinks my shoes are sturdy and cool, but my feet know the truth.

They are easily dirtied by the dirt of the world but not easily cleaned.

The heals are sometimes too high for comfort and sometimes too flat for support.

My shoes are not impressive and don't go with any outfit or situation.

Sometimes I want to take them off and walk barefoot, no one wants to see that raw flesh.

But these shoes carry me through my journeys as an Angel Mommy.

They are the only protection I have from the harsh conditions

They are not ones that I would ever choose but they are mine, my badges of courage.

They only fit me, I could never loan them out of give them away.

I wear them daily in all seasons and in any weather.

They are one of a kind, priceless, ageless, forever.

So before you criticize my journey in my shoes, why don't you try them on?







2 comments:

  1. I am sorry to read about this. You're right, nobody can fathom or even feel the amount of pain you feel after losing a child. I hope you are a lot better now since writing this.

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